Michelle Tant

Now I only need to write essays for fun! Yes, its all done. All that's left is to put the folder in the post. It's out of my hands. That's not to say I didn't enjoy the writing aspect of the course, as I did immensely, its just I feel ready now for a period of writing without having to worry about getting my references perfect. Or in fact, write without referring to anyone. Love blogging. The relief is palpable. I sat down this evening without that moment of thinking "I should be writing an essay". So now I can start looking forward. I have a break planned, as in, I'm not starting teaching until I've started back to work, settled in a little, when life has started to get used to the new rhythm if my being back at 'normal' work will bring. I'm looking forward to teaching, to start building to my own experience, to improve, to become a better breastfeeding counsellor. To start working with women. I've said it before and I'll ...

I'm a Christian. A Christian mummy. I know that my calling right now (and indeed for the rest of my life) is being the best mother I can be. But what about the rest? I know I have other 'things' in my life - the breastfeeding counselling, writing etc, but what about the conviction I've had all my Christian life that I'm meant to be doing something. Else that is. I've read Proverbs 31 inside out and I long to be the woman there, industrious, creative, an excellent wife and mother but it is very easy to hold Mrs Proverbs up as a yardstick and find myself so incredibly lacking. God loves me, weaknesses and all, I have no doubt about that but I know I have more in me than I'm giving out right now. I was prayed for in church this morning and he said that God does make almost 'allowances' for the childbearing years and don't hear me wrong, but knowing that doesn't make me much less frustrated. I suppose desire wise I'm in a good place...