Breastfeeding support – Missing a trick?

(February 2018)


As a breastfeeding counsellor with experience in facilitating breastfeeding antenatal sessions with over 500 partners of potentially breastfeeding mothers I have shifted my focus over the years from simply helping partners to understand the way feeding works, to helping them to visualise what life will be like as a fully involved parent, enabling their partner to have a positive breastfeeding experience as well as helping their babies to receive the optimum nutrition he or she requires.

Becoming a midwife however has really opened my eyes to the realities of integrating partners in the early neonatal period. There have been improvements in the involvement of partners throughout labour and birth and many NHS Trusts do allow partners to stay for the first night following the birth of their baby in response to mothers saying they want this to happen. However as midwives, what is our expectation of the level of involvement and why do we think they are staying? It is known that mothers with supportive partners are significantly more likely to have a positive and more satisfying breastfeeding experience but I am interested in knowing whether we fully believe that and if we do, what we are actually doing to facilitate the level of support required by the mother.

The partners are invited to stay and by and large, the women want them to do so. The reasons cited seem to be more along the lines of not wanting to be alone which is absolutely fair enough. Rarely do I hear that they are staying to help with the feeding, still possibly because the breastfeeding is seen as the domain of the mother and the partners don’t actually know what they should be doing. We welcome the new family to the ward, cheerfully state that the partner is welcome to stay, here is the water, here is the bell, buzz if you need help with breastfeeding…

So even the midwives and support staff don’t positively know what the partners should be doing. When asked, you will hear the correct answers… along the lines of fetching and carrying, being ‘there for her’ and because that’s what the women want. However my sense is that this response does not carry a full understanding of the importance of the partners role and that a whole maternity wide project is necessary in order to make a difference. I believe we are still in a transitionary phase of partner support with positive spikes in labour care particularly. We are doing the right things, partners are now welcome to antenatal care appointments, birth preparation classes, the birth itself, to stay after the birth, but we are not there with breastfeeding yet.

My own literature research highlights that the relationship between male partners and breastfeeding is not a simple one and there is decades, centuries perhaps of unpicking to do in terms of an acceptance of the dual function of breasts but in many ways we are living in an enlightened age and so I am hopeful that when partners are truly drawn upon as a legitimate means of support, then they will meet the challenge.

The partners I work with as a breastfeeding counsellor, unfailingly, will say that they are here to find out as much as they can so they can help. We tell them they can be present, help, be involved. The time has come to really mean it.

How about routine ‘peer’ support training for partners as part of the antenatal care package? These people are the ones who are most present in those early days. Surely it is a no brainer to equip those with the most access, with the skills necessary to meet the need. Do this antenatally where possible. On the postnatal ward do the same. Teach them how to hand express, about positioning and attachment, about milk supply. When we are called to the bedside for breastfeeding support, actively involve the partner in both the practicalities as well as the knowledge, point out what you are talking about, ask him/her questions to check understanding.

I’m not being outrageous when I suggest peer support training for partners, I know it would cost money however the benefits of longer term breastfeeding, improved postnatal experience and better long term health of mother and infant ultimately equal financial savings to the NHS. A long term outlook not easily seen by our government who only seem able to see short term savings and the financial bottom line.

Political despair notwithstanding, I hope there is something in here that individual midwives and support staff can take and implement. Do let me know what you think.

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